All I could think of as I finally escaped those double doors was why I decided to waste close to 2 hours of my Sunday in the clutches of boredom, the face of awkwardness and in the presence of more strangers that I would have subjected myself had I took the city bus. Oh and the two words "Thank God". Thank God for the fact that I finally made it out of there of course.
As I drove down the road, attempting to clear my memory of the recent event, it occurred to me that I could actually benefit from the previous situation if only by ensuring that it was never to happen again. Well, if it was to at least never happen to the one person I have the power to guarantee this with: Myself.
Note to Self: If for any reason a baby shower is thrown in my honor the following rules shall be strictly adhered to.
1. The location shall never, under any circumstances, be held in a pizza parlor.
2. There shall never be more guests than a standard sheet cake can feed.
3. The noise level will never be so high that anyone has to shout to be heard by the person sitting right next to them.
4. Games will be played with the hope and intent of facilitating conversation between the entire group.
5. While food is important at a lunchtime party, that shall not be the main focus. Said food shall also not contribute to the obesity epidemic of America (this rule may be bent if shower is held outside of the States)
6. While it is understandable that not everyone will know all the attendees, the event must be kept at a size where it is reasonable for people to feel comfortable enough to interact with others. Showers must be split into separate parties for this very reason. IE: One for family, one for friends, one for coworkers, etc.
7. Presents are a key part of a baby shower, but common etiquette suggests not opening them within the first 30 minutes of the shower commencing.
8. Clowns?? Need I say anything more?
9. No matter what, the atmosphere must be keep light and unserious. Otherwise guests will be scheming ways to escape after only being there an hour.
Now that I have that stored away in case of emergencies, on with the rest of my Sunday.
As I drove down the road, attempting to clear my memory of the recent event, it occurred to me that I could actually benefit from the previous situation if only by ensuring that it was never to happen again. Well, if it was to at least never happen to the one person I have the power to guarantee this with: Myself.
Note to Self: If for any reason a baby shower is thrown in my honor the following rules shall be strictly adhered to.
1. The location shall never, under any circumstances, be held in a pizza parlor.
2. There shall never be more guests than a standard sheet cake can feed.
3. The noise level will never be so high that anyone has to shout to be heard by the person sitting right next to them.
4. Games will be played with the hope and intent of facilitating conversation between the entire group.
5. While food is important at a lunchtime party, that shall not be the main focus. Said food shall also not contribute to the obesity epidemic of America (this rule may be bent if shower is held outside of the States)
6. While it is understandable that not everyone will know all the attendees, the event must be kept at a size where it is reasonable for people to feel comfortable enough to interact with others. Showers must be split into separate parties for this very reason. IE: One for family, one for friends, one for coworkers, etc.
7. Presents are a key part of a baby shower, but common etiquette suggests not opening them within the first 30 minutes of the shower commencing.
8. Clowns?? Need I say anything more?
9. No matter what, the atmosphere must be keep light and unserious. Otherwise guests will be scheming ways to escape after only being there an hour.
Now that I have that stored away in case of emergencies, on with the rest of my Sunday.
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